Hello! We've made it to December (sometimes it felt like 2020 would never end). The holidays can be an especially difficult time of year for some people as it is a reminder of not being able to celebrate with those whom are no longer with us. This year many of us are also experiencing grief due to Covid and not being able to celebrate as we normally would. I wanted to take a few moments and provide some ideas of ways to manage feelings of grief over the next few weeks.

First, I want to start with the images from this website. I love these images (I cannot take credit for them, however) because they so simply describe what it is like to experience grief. And as someone pointed out to me, sometimes there are multiple "buttons".

I also love this description because it allows me to identify when I am having a "button being hit" kind-of-day and it reminds me to reach out for support from friends/family.

Often times, people want to avoid their feelings because they are uncomfortable. But it is best to notice them and then decide how to help the feeling. Here are some ideas of ways to help:

1. Feel your feelings- notice when you are having a moment and let that moment happen
2. Plan ahead- be aware of things that might be more difficult and think of ways to still enjoy the day even if it doesn't look like it used to.

3. Learn to say no (boundaries!)- if someone asks you to do something and you are uncomfortable with it, you can always say no. If you want to see them, make plans to see them in a way you are comfortable (wearing a mask, socially distanced, zoom).

4. Put your physical body first- remember to eat, drink water, and try to get good sleep. Without these things, depression and anxiety will likely appear.

5. Get support- phone calls with friends/family, zoom support groups, or zoom dates with friends/family

6. Take action- think of something that will help and then do it! If that means taking time each day to allow a few minutes to think about what you miss, or planning zoom time with family on the holiday, or starting a new tradition of something you enjoy (making a favorite recipe, watching a favorite movie, playing games with people in your household).

I hope your holidays have some moments of contentment and cheer.

Thanks for reading and being in connection with me,

Steph